Crime doesn't pay. You need to know that, you filthy, filthy criminals. If the cops don't get you, "the watch" will.

I have a very informal "watch" organization in my neighborhood. The organization is two members strong right now — Uncle Ricky and myself. We have some people who have expressed interest in joining us, and we are very excited about that.

I don't just watch the area around my home. You see, crime is everywhere, so Ethan Carey and I have our own "at work watch" system. This is where we keep our eyes peeled. You know, if we see something, we say something.

This morning, a mysterious car in the radio station parking lot became cause for concern. I call this a "499er" That's code for car we've never seen before. This car, though, was a "499er XL." It was a late model, Blue, Volkswagen Beetle with a car cover. The cover was placed on the car in what can only be described as a "big hurry." We immediately sprung into action, and were ready for whatever we may see. Here's what happened:

Smashed out window, possible "234" AKA stolen 8-track player. We have CDs on the front seat, toilet paper in the window — That's a "786" AKA "Duke'ing" in the car. This is an open investigation. If you have any information that will help Ethan and Lou "clear this case" please call the I-95 studio at 203-775-9595.

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